on vacation

again. i can see russia from my cruise ship!

sometimes i think i abuse my powers of observation, which allow me to determine what is occurring within one's life. invasion of privacy? perhaps. but i can't help but point out to myself who's feeling depressed, who's incredibly happy, who's NOT at home, and who's highly insecure. there are more, but you wouldn't want to know what i know. of course, there are others who play the game with me, but i'm the only one who actually consciously hides what i'm feeling.

satire

here's how to write truly biting, hilarious, satire. both family guy and the simpsons are experts at this, and now i'll show you some tricks of the trade.

1. fully incorporate the soul into your satire.

(example: twitter plus blonde)

i luv to heart me!!! this thing is allll about me!!!
posted 1 minute ago

just realized that i amm the mostt important part of my life ROXLFX
posted 2 minutes ago

I iz soooo speciall
posted 3 minutes ago

thus, you incorporate the typical blonde joke, a tongue in cheek analysis of twitter, and the caffeinated double or triple key tap at the end of various words, which is 2nd on the list of most annoying things in the world after smilies.

2nd, you must be funny without seeming intentional. Humor stems from the truth displayed in a different way. The drier the satire, the better.

3rd, never force something or try too hard. Good satire is easy to write.

4th, if you have a hidden agenda against the things you skewer, it becomes far easier to write.

thanks for reading! pokemon FTW!

you know

that Heineken commercial?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jqZTJk30qg

yeah, that driver looks more drunk than anyone else in that car

more from vacation

@7:24 cough? sore throat? not good.

@7:45 told it might be allergies. gonna spend some time outside.

@9:20 not allergies.

@10:56 hopefully, will be cured soon. asian power, activate!

psuedo twitter

@10:28 going to the shopping center on TheBus. everything is spelled differently here.

@11:36 lego store placed right next to a 30 foot picture of gisele bundchen in lingerie. ok...

@13:02 why do we always do the most walking in the hottest part of the day?

@15:20 poki is addicting.

@16:09 family guy on the bus lol

@17:21 5 feet waves on the outside. gotta wait a little while though.

@17:33 totally dodged like five gazillion noobs. one got hit by their own board LOL!

@20:04 wow this ramen is awesome. like, real ramen. not the instant crap.